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How I turned curiosity into a superpower (and how you can, too!)

There’s a darn good chance that everything you love in your life—your business, your relationships, your family, and more—has happened because you were curious.

Something had to raise your eyebrow.

Something had to tip the scale between “meh” to “more!”

Something had to drive you to make that first cold call or step into that life-changing introduction.

You could call it fate. I call it curiosity.

It was curiosity that led me to have 35 dates in 35 days (more on that story in a bit) in a concentrated effort to learn more about what I wanted in life and partnership.

It was curiosity that opened the door for me to leave my career as a business attorney to become a dating coach, and then a six-figure serial entrepreneur, business strategist, and keynote speaker.

It is curiosity that continues to drive my business. The secret to great sales is being curious about others—and making the connections work for you.

I still have to work, mind you. There’s no avoiding that.

Curiosity, though, made me eager and energized to learn better and better ways to find—and get!— what I truly wanted. And it will be the same for you.

Whether you are curious about how to level up your business, find great clients, skyrocket your sales, build your team, and more...

It starts by asking the RIGHT questions.
Which leads you to the RIGHT answers.
Which empowers you to take the RIGHT actions.
Which helps you create and fiercely protect the life you love—and the business you’re building alongside it.

I’ll be honest with you. If this process doesn’t scare the pants off you and excite you enough to keep going anyway, you’re probably doing it wrong.

That’s what curiosity does. It keeps you from stalling in front of the wild unknown and sparks you into eagerly discovering what’s around the next corner.

And wouldn’t it be great if it turned out to be everything you wanted?

KNOW WHAT’S NEXT: TAKE THE QUIZ!

JOIN THE ALL-IN COMMUNITY

How It (and I) began…

As a busy attorney in the DC metro area, I was struggling to meet people. So, in 2006, I started a Meetup group called Singles in the Suburbs.

I met someone almost immediately, and we lived happily ever after.

Just kidding.

I did meet someone and we ended up running the group together for about 5 years—until he dumped me. The day after the breakup, I went to my best friend’s house with a bottle of wine in hand and started talking about all of my past relationships and how none of them worked out.

And that’s when it occurred to me—maybe those exes and those relationships weren’t the problems. Maybe it was me.

Instead of getting scared that something was wrong with me, I actively chose to get good and curious.

About to turn 35, I decided to celebrate my birthday by going on 35 dates in 35 days (talk about bold action).

The rules:

I didn’t rule out any “type.” I didn’t state a preference for age, race, or what they did for a living.
The date chose our activity. The point was to do things I wouldn’t normally do and meet people I wouldn’t normally meet—so I had to consciously and willingly step into unknown situations.
I wrote about each and every one. The goal was to create some self-awareness and to help identify the habits that were sabotaging my relationships (and, it turns out, my life!)

It was a great success, both the experiment and the blog I created to capture it. I suddenly found people contacting me for date coaching, which was odd given my business law background. I had people tell me I should become a dating coach, to which I replied “You should call my mom and tell her I want to quit law to become a dating coach and tell me what she says.”

The seed had been planted, though. It wasn’t long before I found myself ending my 13-year career as a business attorney to do exactly that.

And then I lived happily ever after.

Just kidding again.

The real story is that I made a pretty awkward transition from steadily employed to self-employed. And I took the same actions—and made the same mistakes—almost every new entrepreneur makes:

I took on EVERY client who was willing to pay me.
I networked at EVERY group I could find and pitched to ANY who would listen.
I said yes to EVERY opportunity—I never turned down a podcast, a guest blog, or a speaking engagement.
I did ALL THE THINGS in my business—admin, accounting, website, social media, you name it.
I watched EVERY free marketing training and tried ANY visibility tactic they suggested.

The result? Less than awesome. Sure, I had clients—but there was zero correlation between all the work I was doing and the results (and income) I was getting. I was always on the go, but I wasn’t really going anywhere.

Know the feeling?

Safe to say it wasn’t long before my health and personal life took a nosedive, and I was forced to face the fact that I had fallen into the same pattern with my newfound business as I had with dating before my 35-Date adventure.

I was standing in my own way.

The problem wasn’t (just) my commitment to everything (or lack thereof). I had tricked myself into thinking that I was showing up for my business because my calendar was full, my to-do list was long, and people always wanted me to do things with them.

The truth is, I wasn’t showing up for my business at all. Not the business I really wanted, anyway. I failed to connect my offers, my pricing, and my ideal clients with all (ALLLLLL) the actions I was taking. My approach was inconsistent, half-hearted, and stretched thin—and so were my results. Enough was enough.

I made a very scary decision a few days later.

I hired my first business coach.

And now...happily ever after?

Without a doubt—but for reasons that may surprise you.

Having a been-there-done-that coach in my circle gave me the insight (and the swift kick in the pants) I needed to recognize the work I was meant to do, the people I was meant to serve, and the time I was willing to invest.

The minute I got clear on where to put my focus, time, and energy, everything changed.

I surpassed my attorney salary within three months.
I sold out every program and maintained a full practice.
I toured on a national panel and was selected as a change-maker by the United States of Women Summit, hosted by the White House.
I was hired for paid speaking engagements around the world.
Over the past 10 years, I’ve worked with hundreds of entrepreneurs to start, grow, and scale their businesses, helping to generate millions of dollars in revenue
And I did it working fewer hours than ever before.

In short: I did everything I set out to do and made more money than I ever thought possible—with LOTS of time to spare.

When I got curious as to why it all worked—and why it keeps working out—I saw that it has everything to do with intentionally discovering the right motivations, nurturing the right relationships, and taking the right actions.

When you know how to separate the distracting fluff from The Meaningful Stuff, everything gets easier.

Looking back, those 35 dates taught me everything I needed to know about how to find “my people,” build a profitable business, make an impact, and create a community. And how to grow (and grow and grow) by finding—and not losing—myself in the process.

And that’s exactly what I want for you—and exactly why I’m doing everything I can to inspire as many women as possible to KNOW what they want—and only saying YES to that.